A Year Ago

A year ago, my eyes were opened to your distress

I saw a you Iā€™d never seen before-

Lost, alone, bereft,

The light gone from your eyes.

And I could not reach you ā€“ no matter how I pled

A year ago, I saw your path

And fell to my knees begging God ā€“ 

To shine the light on you

To lead you out

To show you truth

To save you.

Three times you fell

And struggled back.

And then you left.

I never heard your voice again.

Oh my son,

I weep because I will never see your face again.

I weep for the end.

I weep for the day when I will see you once more.

And know that you are safe.

And I will weep no more.

Jane 2017


It’s nearing 6 months since we sold the home my husband (with a little help from friends, family and myself) built for us. When we built that place, we thought of it as our forever home. We didn’t take into account that the family we had then, our abilities, endurance and needs would change in a few years. We had to let go of a lot of our preconceived ideas of what aging would do with us. As time has advanced, we have become more aware of the temporariness of our physical and mental abilities.

Log House in Winter

We were happy that a lovely family took residence – and we know they will love our place as much as we did.

We moved into a place that was a true fixer-upper. We didn’t really look at this place thoroughly before we committed, but I did and still do believe it was the place God wanted us to have. We have lovely neighbors and it’s a nice little town. But it’s a bit like adopting a teenager instead of giving birth and shaping the little one to your family values. This teenager(adult) has a mind of its own and wasn’t put together in the best way to start with! Some things we can fix, others we will have to just cope with.

Dixon house

We have spent a lot of money and time working on this place to make it our own, make it livable and give it our own stamp. And there’s still a lot to do. But we are hoping it will be a home base where we can still create and serve as long as we are physically and mentally able. We have to decide what possessions we must keep and what we can give away. Time is a gift and a thief!

But more important than these temporary abodes is the prospect of our eternal home awaiting us. We look forward to being with Jesus, walking and talking with Him, perhaps in the Garden of Eden.

green leaf plant beside river
Garden of Eden (?)

We really don’t know what lies on the other side, but we DO know that Jesus will be there and we’ll be like Him, in His presence, without pain or sorrow.

In the meantime, it’s important to keep our eyes on Jesus, to keep in mind that we are in a war that Christ has already won but not completed yet. We are to carry the gospel to those who don’t know Him.